Decisions are hard to make. I am the most indecisive person in the world. Where to eat? What to wear? When to do xxx? To go here or not? Is that the right choice? Will I regret? This is the biggest question - will i regret? decisions will be so much easier to make if the 'regret' word does not come along after that. i remember some of my previous 'major' decision in life - what to study? one day before submission of form during Form 6. i was still deciding to study physics or biology. the whole of form 6 know where they want to go, except for me. this is bad. i kinda 'go with the flow', as i always do. which is highly not recommended. but it has a good side in it. i always hope that God will just show me a sign. and blink "green light" and Thou shall go xxx. ta-da! problem solved. maybe this is call faith? =p
so anyway, a night before form submission, i was like,"God, this is my last chance to decide. what to do!?" then while reading the bible, the whole devotion was talking about building materials, how many feet long and wide etc.. ONLY! super physics-like. so that was how i ended up in physics class during Form 6. and i never regretted a bit. i cannot imagine myself studying biology after that! and of course, the fun that i had in physics class! haha..
then comes university application. to be honest, i was pretty clueless to especially if you know how public university works. so i submitted all my 8 choices and just leave it to God. i convinced myself that i am going to go Terrengganu cause KL universities are hard to get in. Lo and behold, i ended up in environmental science in UKM! something that i have not dreamed of since young. but of cos it's my 2nd choice =). i wanted to be an interior designer/air stewardess/mass comm/ news reporter/hotel manager/archaeologist/scientist/teacher .. etc. you know how my ambition changes every year since Std. 1 (the report card that we fill in during primary school. I wrote singer!! 0.0 and fireman)
so anyway, after 3 years in UKM doing Environmental Science, i have never regretted a bit. So, after the long story, my point is this. BIG Daddy knows what is best for me and knows what I can/cannot do/want/like since i am a clueless person. Now as i am embarking into the next journey, am i still as clueless as before? yes and no. yes cause i do not konw what i want but no because i try to change my 'bad habit' and have learnt much in the process of searching. ok, back to my point. my Daddy is in control. no matter what the outcome may be, I know it is gonna be good! i MUST have faith.
So, Daddy, what's up next? am i ready to embark this new journey of life? I don't know. you are, aren't you? I know You'll teach me more things and woots, it's gonna be exciting! then again, make my decision now. can you please show me a green light? i will obey! makes my whole decision making process simpler. i shall not regret.
Jeremiah 29:11 For I know the plans I have for you, plans to prosper you and not plans to harm you. plans to give you a hope and a future.
amen! You promised to give me a future yeah! not a doom's day thing. so, now i can go and sleep, wake up tmr, fully confident that things are gonna be alright =)
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